When the Holidays Feel Heavy

To every family caregiver who is home this holiday because your loved one can’t travel, or because this is your first holiday without them… I see you. You are not forgotten. I know you are doing the hard work and making difficult decisions in the best interests of your loved ones.

Holidays can feel heavy when caregiving responsibilities make travel impossible or extremely difficult. I remember one holiday when I spent weeks calling dialysis centers to make arrangements so we could go out of town. I spent days gathering extra medications and supplies, and hours packing the car, only to face a medical emergency about an hour before we were supposed to leave. We spent the rest of the holiday at the hospital.

Maybe this is your first Thanksgiving without your loved one, I remember the complex emotions I had to sit with on my first Thanksgiving without Emanuel. I focused on art and crafts projects. I wanted to create something beautiful to contrast what I was feeling in my heart. It was a wonderful distraction, and I created a beautiful memory.

Please know that your love and your sacrifice mean more than you may ever realize. I am praying special caregiver prayers for you today.

If you feel the need for connection, there is an online caregiver chat room that operates 365 days a year, including Thanksgiving Day at 9:00 PM Eastern Time. You don’t have to walk this season alone. I’ll share the link here: https://rb.gy/fx4djb

If you’re looking for gentle ways to create new memories or simply care for your heart today, here are a few simple ideas you might consider:

• Watch the Thanksgiving parade or a favorite holiday movie

• Call a friend who may be single or home alone

• Invite your mother, a neighbor, or a loved one to spend the day with you

• Give yourself permission to keep the meal simple, a big dinner is not required to be thankful

• Do an arts and crafts project or work on a puzzle

• Attend church online or watch a virtual service

• Take a quiet walk and reflect on what you’re grateful for this season

• Light a candle in honor of the one you miss

• Write a letter to your loved one and share what’s in your heart

However this day looks for you, please remember: your presence matters, your love matters, and your life matters. I care about you, and I’m praying that even in the midst of change, you will experience moments of peace, comfort, and unexpected joy.

What holiday traditions or memory-making ideas would you suggest to others spending the season at home?

With care and love,

The Caregiver CEO